Saturday: Time FLIES when you are having fun

Blue sky. Exactly what the doctor ordered for the sky dive. I was so happy in the morning that I forgot to wash the conditioner out of my hair because I was in such a rush to get to the train station to meet Marjolein. We were calling her Margerine like the fake butter that everyone should stop eating immediately because it rots your insides because we did not know how to pronounce her name. Marjoleine is pronounced Maraline. We took a train ride to Wollongong which was along the coast and was gorgeous. I got yelled at for having my sneakers on the seat in front of me. Rude Americans…can’t take them anywhere.
When we arrived at this little shack next to a park we knew that we were in for a wild ride. 8 jumpers signed our lives away (see below) and got on our gear.

 Marjoleine and I were laughing because we were in blue and yellow suits. We joked that we were like Swedish Meatballs from IKEA falling from the sky. I was so slow getting my gear on that I ended up with an XL which made it even more attractive. Have no fear, there was a big XL on my sleeve to prove that it was the size that I had on. The guys that were jumping had a big S on their sleeve because they were little pee wees. Sky diving is not an ego boost. You look ridiculous, you have this harness on that rides up every crevice of your body and you are strapped to a stranger.  The picture below only has us half dressed.  Imagine having this harness strapped to your booty.

As we were getting ready to board the plane…the black clouds of rain rolled in. Down pouring. We were laughing because of course it was down pouring. 8 jumpers and 8 hung over tandem instructors boarded this little puddle jumper. If you are claustrophobic, NEVER skydive. Here is why. You sit in two single file rows between each others legs and strapped to the guy behind you with no where to turn. Marjoleine and I were laughing and very calm through the whole process but other people were hyperventilating, swearing, saying they were going to crap their pants, etc. I was actually surprised at how calm I was. It may be because my instructor (Tall Aussie guy named Wade) gave me instructions for the 5th time but poor Marojleine’s guy Pauly was falling asleep due to too much partying the night before. It was really hilarious. Pauly wanted to kill me because on this tight small plane I kept yelling things like “Canonballlll! Boooombs Awaaaay! Giranomoooo!” We thought it was so funny but the rest of the sardines were not amused. Don’t worry, you will see it all on tape. I got a DVD which is not attractive at all but is really pretty funny. The plane door opened and all we could see was white cloud. I was still calm. The first tandem jumpers launched out the door. In the DVD you see my face go from excited to pure fear. The next 2 go in about 5 seconds and then it was my turn. Fortunately, I had no time to think because Wade said 1,2 and I held my breath like I was jumping into water. Stupid move because we were out the door and no one told me that there was no oxygen in clouds. I was in my banana position and we were hurling at 233 km/hr down to planet earth. It felt like pins and needles going through the cloud. I couldn’t breath but didn’t care. You will see me grasping for air but it was so much fun. Once we got out of the cloud he pulled the chute and I could see the beach. Wait until you see it. I don’t have any pictures because if I dropped my camera I could have killed someone if it had landed on them. Bugger! The landing was smooth for me. I watched someone land in a mud puddle and another in the bushes. Wade took good care of me. It was everything I wanted it to be and more.

I am going to try to do it again when the sun is shining. Yes, I will be talking all of you into skydiving with me when I return to the US. Get ready…it is unbelievable!